Well, we aren't going to make it in time. Aaron spoke with our director this morning, and she was kind enough to let us know that we will NOT be getting a referral this month. Thus, we will not be making it in time for court closures. Stink.....
So what now? We wait. The grace that is needed will now come to me, in daily doses I'm sure, to make it through this wait. My prayer is that I can wait well. Meaning, no doubting of God's perfect timing, no being angry or trying to blame this or that for the reason we wait, no crying unexpectedly .... well, maybe the last one can happen a couple of times. The hardest part for me is knowing that Malachi will have to sit in an orphanage without us, his family for 4-5 more months. It saddens me to think of how he will grow, the things he will learn as every baby does.... all without me there snapping pictures of every first. I suppose there was always going to be some element of that, as we weren't ever expecting a newborn. Anyway, today I'm at least able to let go of this hope I've been clinging to. I'm able to stop jumping with every phone call. I'm able to completely focus on all that is to come these next 4-5 months without wondering - "what if we have to leave for Africa, then what?". Things like a pending move, homeschooling, leading (or not at this point) a womens study in the fall, travel, and of course .... 4-5 more months of enjoying the family God has made us thus far -- until life turns crazy crazy with one more. (Or 2???)
I will certainly post when the referral comes. I can't imagine it NOT coming sometime in July. So we will have a picture to hold on to at least. That will be good for the kids belief, and for my heart I suppose.
Life continues...... and so does Grace.
2 Cor 12:9 - My grace is sufficient for you
Isaiah 30:15 In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and in trust shall be your strength.
Isaiah 30:18 Therefore the Lord waits to be gracious to you, and therefore he exalts himself to show mercy to you. For the Lord is a God of justice; blessed are all those who wait for him.
Isaiah 40:31 but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.
Romans 8:25 But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.
**Lamentations 3:22-25 The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. "The Lord is my portion", says my soul, "therefore I will hope in him". The Lord is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him.**